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Josh Billings Quotes


Honesty is the rarest wealth anyone can possess, and yet all the honesty in the world ain't lawful tender for a loaf of bread.

I have lived in this world just long enough to look carefully the second time into things that I am most certain of the first time.

I have never known a person to live to be one hundred and be remarkable for anything else.

I haven't got as much money as some folks, but I've got as much impudence as any of them, and that's the next thing to money.

I think when the full horror of being fifty hits you, you should stay home and have a good cry.

If a man should happen to reach perfection in this world, he would have to die immediately to enjoy himself.

If there was no faith there would be no living in this world. We could not even eat hash with any safety.

If you ever find happiness by hunting for it, you will find it, as the old woman did her lost spectacles, safe on her own nose all the time.

It ain't often that a man's reputation outlasts his money.

It is a very delicate job to forgive a man, without lowering him in his own estimation, and yours too.

It is better to know nothing than to know what ain't so.

It is much easier to repent of sins that we have committed than to repent of those that we intend to commit.

It is not all bad, this getting old, ripening. After the fruit has got its growth it should juice up and mellow. God forbid I should live long enough to ferment and rot and fall to the ground in a squash.

It's not only the most difficult thing to know one's self, but the most inconvenient.

Knowledge is like money: the more he gets, the more he craves.

Laughter is the sensation of feeling good all over and showing it principally in one place.

Learning sleeps and snores in libraries, but wisdom is everywhere, wide awake, on tiptoe.

Life consists not in holding good cards but in playing those you hold well.

Life is short, but it's long enough to ruin any man who wants to be ruined.

Love is said to be blind, but I know some fellows in love who can see twice as much in their sweethearts as I do.