Funny Quotes
Until you walk a mile in another man's moccasins you can't imagine the smell.
We'll love you just the way you are if you're perfect.
Weather forecast for tonight: dark.
What contemptible scoundrel has stolen the cork to my lunch?
What does it mean to pre-board? Do you get on before you get on?
When I was a boy the Dead Sea was only sick.
When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second. When you sit on a red-hot cinder a second seems like an hour. That's relativity.
Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.
You're only as good as your last haircut.